Hmm. I bet there are so many other people who feel exactly as the title says. I've sure been feeling that way lately. It just seems like I'm 2 steps in back of everyone else. Like everyone is out there having fun, and just living life to it's fullest. I know I've definitely had my share of problems with being afraid to really get out there and have fun for a change.
Then, out of nowhere, I came across this quote:
"Just because today was a terrible day doesn't mean tomorrow won't be the best day of your entire life, you just have to wake up and get there." -Pete Wentz
Some people here are probably thinking "Yeah, right. Because I'm going to wake up tomorrow and all my problems are going to be magically gone. Sure." But that's not it. We just have to have hope and keep pushing on that tomorrow we could wake up, and it's just going to be amazing. We all have our time to shine, maybe it's tomorrow, maybe it's in a week, maybe it's not even until you're 50 years old! But it'll come eventually, just you wait and see.
I know what it feels like to feel like you're not going to fit in, to try and hide yourself because you're afraid of being rejected, but that's okay. God tells us to be different, to not give in to the conformist ways of this world. The song "Anti Conformity" By. Krystel Meyers really explains that, and it has a catchy beat :] Look it up sometime.
To wrap this all up, I just wanted to explain that no matter how bad your week is going, or maybe even month is going, just keep waiting for your moment. Because in that moment, God will give you your time to shine, and you're going to Rock It! :]
" And if our God is for us, then who could ever stop us? And if our God is with us, then what could stand against?"
Ahh....I don't know about you, but those lyrics make me feel invincible. I've been having the worst self esteem issues, and last night at youth, I heard those words and I felt like I was capable of doing anything I desired.
It always seems like when I'm at my highest point in confidence, when my anxiety is under control, stupid Satan comes and brings drama or pain and makes everything even lower than when it began. I'm happy for once in a long while, I'm laughing with my friends, then one day, I wake up, and look in the mirror, and I feel ugly, worthless, hatred to myself than I had ever before. Then I went to youth last night, feeling completely terrible, and God just makes me feel like I'm worth something again.
I've had these issues with anxiety and esteem for a while, but when I started high school it got ten times worse. I always feel like everyone is looking at me, like their talking bad things about me, And I know I'm just over thinking it, but I can't help it. It just amazes me how one morning I'm crying and that very night I'm on top of the world.
I realized through all of this though....and through watching the movie "Fireproof" (Which I have to say, was amazing), That I am fireproof myself, fire will come, but with God by my side I'm not going to get burned, And that amazes me in a million different ways.
The whole point in this post is because I feel like there's so many other girls out there, struggling with the things I'm going through too. I just want to let them all know, even though I don't feel beautiful myself most of the time, It doesn't matter what you look like, what outfit you're wearing to school, how your hair looks 24/7. God is going to judge you by what's in your heart and nothing more. So stand by Him no matter what, and He promises he'll reward you in the end.
Thank you so much to everyone who reads and follows my blog, I really enjoy writing and it's amazing to be able to share what God is doing in my life, and I love you all :]
Stay strong, get through it, It'll all be okay in the end<3
